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With the current epidemic of celebrity kiddy-fiddlers, the human genome project saga, the disastorous form of Leeds United, the Risin crisis and the potential break out of war, i feel it is my duty to my dedicated fans to bring you up to date on these issues.

Search for Alkaeda and Nuclear weapons
THE IRAQ'y' SITUATION - Since September 11th 2001, Mr Bush (excluding USA) has declared war on terrorism, meaning Afghanistan. Thousands of marines were sent in to battle with the skiny Afghan'ys' wearing dipers, bomber jets blew the shit out of the country. Marine forces fought of Alkaeda forces and the war with Afghanistan was supposedly over. However Bin Laden escaped the bloodshed and carnage and made it to Scarborough to meet up with Sadam in a trailer park. Negotiations were struck and Sadam began to buy Nuclear Warheads.

Sadam ventured back to Iraq where further weapons were stashed. Mr Bush after recovering from choking on a pretzel realised that Sadam Hussain was actually not American. His advisors also realised about the Hidden Warhead situation and sent out weapon inspectors. However, Sadam was cunning, he hid the nukes in camels and under leaves and sand, and the inspectors walked away with no evidence but suspition.

Tony Blair, finished polishing Bush's shoes and both agreed that unless Iraq gives in then they would attack. At this moment Bush realised something else which had great relevance, that Iraq was across the water and so they would need boats.

The forces of USA sent warships and soldiers to the middle east shortly followed by Blair armed with Sheree's lips and an arrow.

Potential war could break out in the Middle East, as it stands nothing has happened.

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Risin epidemic
With the incident a few decades ago where risin played an important part in the manufacturing on the end of an umbrella, and now with some random scally's making risin and threatening the world it seems like if in the wrong hands (bush), devastating effects could occur.
Risin is a poison 10 times more deadly then cyanide, and kills even through inhaling the fumes when burned.
However such dramatic effects have been brought to life by the clumsy use of it in domestic products.
Early this use George Bush claimed that risin was a microwave curry meal, but was soon rectumfied by Blair.
It has also been linked in the process of distilling malt (hops) in brewerys, claiming that it speeds up the reaction between the bacteria and hops and however speeding up the death of anyone who drinks it.
With the threat of anthrax just a year ago, the USA was in turmoil, packages appearing on peoples doors scared the country. Bush nearly died when a package containing anthrax was sent to him, becoming confused he licked the letter shut agin and sent it away.
Now risin, "the potential outbreak of a substance like this would wipe out a country like Washington" said Bush.
We pray in hope.

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